took shots out of a medicine cup. i can get used to college.
We learned a valuable lesson from last night. You can, in fact, order bacon on a Big Mac.
phone sex would be way better if there was an app for that...
either she was really happy we won flip cup, or she was too drunk to notice her boyfriend behind her.
Second wave of rafting ended in a concussion. Don't worry though, the paramedic says it's still not considered a DUI.
Only thing I got out of his drunken Spanish is something that sounded like "pencil sharpener." Damn rosetta stone.
I kind of learned that hotels are unnecessary. Boys will just take you home, but that's tough with a group. I believe in us, though.
It was like the devil him self busted his red hot satanic nuts all over my face and burned my eyes out of my innocent sockets.
I'm gonna eat you out. But for science
I got my nipples pierced. If you haven't seen my boobs in the past week, you're among the minority
Its honestly only a matter of time before I punch him in the face... I'll try to control myself until you guys break up
If you feel frisky later I have a cowboy hat that would look great on you naked...
Who is this......
I just realized I'm not wearing clothes. I think my pants may be in the kitchen but I have no idea where my shirt is. I'm kinda worried.
No. I'm home alone and 100% dickless. I hate my life.
It’s awful. They need to open the bars. I’m now trolling grocery stores looking for dick
Randomize
