life lesson #1: a fart during an awkward silence between 2 strangers doesnt make it less awkward.
As long as you don't die I'm in full support of your drinking decisions
we had incredible sex, then he proposed with the vibrating cock ring
You know you're an adult when you break 100 to get 75 cents, to buy a condom from a bar vending machine in South Boston.
I'd have paid money to see Cookie Monster playing with a vibrator
GO AHEAD, BITCH, GLARE AT MY WAFFLE ONE MORE TIME. I WILL FUCK YOU UP.
People spilled so much that there was a thin film of beer on the floor. You took a running start, screamed, "SLIP AND SLIDE!" and slid face first through the drywall.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
We hooked up in his car and afterwards he cried. I think I need to find a new hookup...
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
Due to this morning's events my new porn name is Reepa Nipplov.
Can I just fuck someone without it basically becoming an arranged marriage
He's at Disney with 4 kids and I'm drinking wine from the bottle in bed at 2:45pm. Does it sound like we're compatible??
In any case. I fucked a married couple recently. Know what a straight person would've done there? Been super weirded out by 1/3 of the genitals there, that's what.
Apparently I gave a guy a hand job on the dance floor. ON THE DANCE FLOOR.
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