the star wars geek is hitting on me, and is talking about his lightsaber. need back up NOW
I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
he rolled over and started playing skeeball on his iphone after we had the best sex yet considering he only lasted 10 seconds last time.. im getting standards.. tomorrow. for now im just going to enjoy the fact i counted over 20 this time.
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I just watched 2 blind guys walk into each other head on in providence. It pays to pregame in your car.
um so slept at robs. he woke up, looked at me, and said ' oh my psychiatrists are gonna have a field day with this one' I think that's when you know you can't hang out with someone anymore
I wonder what blackout Alex would think of her?
probably "functioning vagina, must touch"
Oh god. Just tried to hail a pizza delivery car. Awkward.
International sake day = success
He was twisted. Literally. It's like God took his dick with a pair of pliers and gave it a half twist to the left.
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Let's hurry up so I can puke at home instead of my van
also somebody did cough syrup and i was really worried but i couldn’t express why properly so i was like MACKLEMORE SAYS NO
He stopped me in the middle of a blow job to call his grandma for her birthday.
At least he has family values.
Real life skills section of my resume: blow jobs, food knowledge trivia, sarcasm, mascaera application, sexting, tolerance of rail liquors
I mean, I'm not hammered, but I definitely can't show my face or tits in that bowling alley again
Randomize