You just kept saying over and over "Tell me I won't do it." Someone finally told you you won't. You did. Welcome to herpes.
i am about to cut my stepbrother's hair into a mohawk with the same clippers i use to trim my pubes. god is so on my side today.
This is so fucking sad. Netherlands isn't even a real country.
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
update: ifinallt managed t5o be in a. Horizontal position without throwing up... the snmall victories.
No more scars from drunken holidays, people are starting to notice.
can you please explain how one drink turns into 5 street signs with their poles lying around my room
Why can't I live in a world where my only 2 options are rum bikini hot tub party or masturbating?
She once gave me sex advice over the phone while intoxicated. So no you don't have the cooler therapist.
ripping the fire alarm off the wall probably seemed like a better idea last night than it really was.
After seeing all of the pics during the trial, all I could think was "her vagina doesn't look THAT dangerous"
i was sitting in the back of a squad car completely stoned watching airplanes take off
Also I'm so used to having sex with river guides that when he pulled out a condom I was actually surprised
I shouldn't have watched rise of the planet of the apes and then gotten high. I'm now convinced that the cats are out to get me.
I gave him a BJ in the shower
I just fell and it seemed like a good idea when I was down there
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