White coat. Heels.
you left a giant bottle of vodka in my room from last night. does this serve as a parting gift or hush money?
Discovered the secret to willingly attending my 3-o'clock class. Ahoy, Cap'n.
She swallowed my jizz and then took a shot of jack daniels and said "chaser." This cant be real life.
i found the one person in the world who takes longer to cum than i do... mutual dissatisfaction is probably not the best foundation for a relationship.
Yeah, this dress is irreparably whorey. I've resigned myself to being a family scandal.
I don't deserve a penis
My gut feeling that we had reached a new level of intimacy last night was confirmed early this morning when you sleep farted on penis.
i just got banned from the m&m's website for trying to get poon slayer written on my custom order
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
This whole quitting my bad habits all at once is really messing with my ability to function.
The true debate: do I prioritize going to bed and getting more than six hours of sleep or do I prioritize washing out various grease, leaf bits, and jizz out of my hair
I sent him home with blood on his fingers and shame in his heart.
I’m doing some soul searching to figure out how much of a slut I’m going to be the rest of the summer.
She needs to move out. Her mom interferes with my penis being touched
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