So its not gay if you have sex with another woman and its academic
so what if I'm having sex with a woman for recreation?
Thats gay
a woman just threw her tv out the window while screaming "will you fucking work now?". i'm never moving
I wonder how many times I can be hungover in one day
our drinking schedule never changed, we just drank at work.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
i should have probably stopped drinking when my beer pong shots were hitting the other team in the face..
yeah thats usually a good indication.
the realtor just took us to a house I had a one night stand in. I feel like it's a sign.
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
I woke up to him using my debit card to order PPV porn and Jimmy Johns. I don't even know his name.
I feel like he's only with me because no one else would blow him.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
Are we sharing a room, or can I pack my vibrator?
Yes to both. We'll use the workout rotation from dorm life.
This is why I need to move out...so my naked vomit covered walk of shames to the bathroom are only witnessed by one other person who is equally as pathetic as me and the cat
So I have to masturbate in a hospital. I wonder what kind of porn they have.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
Randomize