i just drank a strangers drink off a toilet
You should get sea herpes
I mean sea horses
even the sluttiest version of myself will not go down on him
He offered but I said no. I didn't think it'd be cool to accept cupcakes in the mens room of a gentlemans club.
he passed out at 11 at a party. he deserved to be stripped down an duct taped to the floor
She's just so happy...and so naked.
posting about faith hill is really not helping you get me into your bed
I think I'm drunk at the airport. Oh the possibilities
Being able to fart in my own house is like 90% of why I pay rent
I didn't pay $79 for lingerie for you to cum in 30 seconds
His ex told me that she wanted me to "take care of" him but from the way she said it I couldn't tell if she wants me to look after him or murder him.
You were supposed to catch herpes, not feelings!!!
is it bad that I see hot guys I wanna sleep with as challenges instead of actual people?
yes. but it works for you
He thought reverse cowgirl meant he dressed up as a cowgirl. Honestly, it was more creepy than funny
We free pour in this house. Measuring alcohol is for the weak
Randomize
