you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
there is a ziplock bag over sangria in a wineglass in the fridge...classy?
Who is John, and why is his named carved into our toilet?
I was giving him a handjob and he commented that he loved my nailpolish....I'm destined to die a fag hag
Totally forgot this... How weird was it when they were licking our faces
Blacked in riding a tandem bicycle with a stranger. We stopped for hot dogs.
I'm sitting at home, day drinking, while watching crossroads with brittany spears. I'm not the person you should be asking for advice right now.
I feel like he's mythological. Like you just had lunch with the Loch Ness Monster of hotness
He tried to puke in the 14th hole and when I told him to stop he started chanting "hole in one hole in one"
The other day I was really high and I felt like my words were coming out of my mouth in flowers...I don't know.
Yeah I don't remember how I got home last night
Judging from my pants, I embarrassed myself smh
Pretty sure my boner drove me home. Like it didn't just do the steering it was the gas and brake too..
P.S. If you wake up before noon it still counts as morning sex
I just walked out of the side door of the bar to come in the front door so no one would know I've been here drinking before our work meeting.
Lol, yeah it'll be fun,but will it be cereal and dick pics fun?
Randomize