Well douche your snatch and let's go!
I'm sorry my penis didn't work
I hope no one judges me for becoming a facebook fan of "Adderall" at 5:49 AM...
I admit it's going to be hard to top a limo orgy and Mcnuggets....but I have faith in you
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
hes wearing the same tie today that i tied him up with last night.i wanna go home
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
You handed me a red solo cup filled with vodka and Bacon. You called it the salty Russian.
We took it as we must go to waffle house or else we will upset the gods.
Drunk me made out with someone's girlfriend last night, was invited to their place for a semi-threesome, and then walked home at three am. Can't decide if this is better or worse than drunkenly challenging everyone to taekwondo sparring matches...
I've never seen an uncircumcised dick in real life and the internet indicates I don't want to.
There are two guys's cum on my sheets. Be a man and be the third.
Tequila is gods way of telling you don't fuck with tequila
My dog just ran downstairs with my vibrator in her mouth... during my dad's birthday dinner.
These snow days are takeing a toll on my liver
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