Why do all fat girls have "that smell"?
Freshman orientation day on campus. Dear diary, JACKPOT.
there has got to be a maximum amount of semen a person can take in before they get some kind of poisoning.
He acted like he was sleep fucking because I woke up to him screwing me in the middle of the night and he had is eyes closed and was mumbling things the whole time and wouldn't respond to me.
Is that even possible?
I called him by the wrong name to test him and he instantly stopped, rolled over and acted like he was still sleeping...I think he might break up with me tomorrow.
If your wondering why there is a puddle on the floor is I may have decided to make a kiddie pool in your living room.
I told him I liked how shrimp feels in my mouth, but I don't actually like eating it. Turned out to be the most awkward way to say that I wanted to suck his dick.
we had break-up sex in a port-a-potty. how do you think it went?!
Growing a beard is gonna make smoking a pipe look so much more majestic
day drinking caused me to be in bed at a decent time. can't complain.
I might go bald with this hair pulling thing every night.
I started carrying sissors in my purse to open plan B with. Both ashamed and proud.
What are we just gonna be those girls that get fucked in your parents basement and not get taken to dinner? I don't wanna be those girls.
Just don't do anything stupid
i did a stupid sorry
He was trying to break into my apartment to get the coke he left last night, didn't engage parking break, so the van started rolling. yup, it's broken.
You do realize it’s only a matter of time before I have a bad day and come home with an alpaca?
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