I have demons in me.
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
idea:have a jello shot stand(opposed to lemonade stand) to raise money for spring break
She is sleeping in a dress because she's too drunk to put "real clothes" on
three guys just busted into my bio lecture, yelled "happy st. patrick's day!", downed jagerbombs, and left.
Nada. Shooting off confetti and wanted to see I'd u could see it from ur house.
Wow. Its not even 11am.
you were sitting on the floor eating oats. how should i react?
found scuba porn. totally not sexy. life continues to disappoint.
The kid across the hall found me in the hallway using a hot pocket box as a pillow. I said its okay I live here.
there is a guy passed out on top of me and i don't know what to do. help if you're awake? was anyone anyone expecting someone? maybe he found the wrong room?
He was running late for work this morning, so I helped him out by finding a matching pair of black socks. And I hated it. So I'm currently drinking and reminding myself of the reasons I will never get married.
Now you know my pain. Live with it. Own it. Recognize it. Cause its like shitting napalm.
People are stripping in McDonalds. Do I join?
YES.
dude there's a blind guy on the trail using his service dog to hit on girls.
Mom and dad should be so proud half of their children have gotten naked in the same local grocery store
Randomize
