I want to touch your soul through your body...with my penis...
Mike i'm at church right now...
making out was so insane. it felt like our tongues were paintbrushes made of waves and we were painting an ocean galazy
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
He just remixed a spongebob song with 2 chainz..... Clearly I love him
I didnt say frisky time, just alone time, to chat, or watch a show, or stare into one anothers eyes, or souls, or asses, whatever you straight people do
he drank all my beer while i was at work and passed out on my couch, when i got home he was out cold and my room mates pig was licking him. they seemed peaceful, so i took 20 bucks from his wallet and left again.
Apparently I'm short enough to sit on his lap and fuck him while he is driving because the cop didn't notice.
Never let him bartend when he's tripping. He sprinkled a ton of mexican shredded cheese over a jack and coke and called in a Monterey Jack Daniels.
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
a guy just walked through our campsite, crouched down by the truck, screamed "ACID ONLY LASTS FOR 8 HOURS RIGHT?!", then ran off into the bushes
My skirt was too short for the church and I brought my flask to the Scrooge play. God bless us, everyone!
I'm tripping pretty hard right now but every time a Volvo drives by I feel like everything is gonna be alright
I sent my roommate a text from MY phone that said, "I don't know where my phone is." Must've been a good night.
I am rewearing my dress from last night. I only wore it for like two hours before fucking. And I took it off first so no cock contact. This is my new standard of cleanliness.
Its safe now. But... Nobody should sleep on my bed tonight.
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