we got sick of 7 11 doubles so we made up a game where you just drink when anyone rolls a 5
thats barely a game just flip a coin
should we drink on heads or tails?
I think I tried picking up these girls last night by asking them what their favorite color was...I obviously woke up alone
So I'll spare the details, but I think I discovered I'm lactose intolerant. In my sleep. And you'll be needing new sheets.
Look what our sorority has done to us...we're hitting on girls in hopes of getting an awesome little.
well what is some mechanical horse racing with out blow involved
we knew we'd be okay when we walked up to the dealers house and he asked us to please be quiet as to not wake his nana.
Just had such a rough shit, don't stop believin had to be played
CHEMICAL ENGINEER. God my mom would be so proud of me.
Do not deep throat a rocket pop, it WILL go into your lungs, and you may die.
I literally put my pussy on his sideburns, it was awkward
There's a lil minaj in everyone
I had the most traumatic dream I've ever had just now. I ripped my dick off because a girl asked me to and spent the rest of the dream crying about my dick
Let us ponder on the good times. Ya know when the Jonas brothers were incapable of growing facial hair and I didn't fully understand what a dick looks like
Maybe he injected his testicle?
It's funny when you can't take a fishing boat because you fucked the captains wife
So apparently my bro is going to make me fix his tattoo this trip... He sent me a pic of said tattoo. Tattoo is of a sperm, on his penis, which was in a woman's mouth... Wth
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