do you remember how we all fit in that bathtub?
tequila
so we had a 20 minute conversation and created the fb page WWND (what would Nana do?) last night after we took our Ambien...that is my definition of an overachiever
You told the cops that they couldn't arrest you because they weren't hot enough to fuck
Do you think girls in gamma phi sit around and think about how much they suck?
I accidentally requested the ides of march off instead of st patricks day. Is this an omen? will alcohol be my brutus?
it makes it look bigger when i shave, i hope its not the same for a girl
So my grandma sent me a valentines day present of waterproof mascara, tissues, and chocolate. Way to reinforce that I'll be single and depressed on valentines day. Thanks grandma.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
crossing my fingers that hitting golf balls off my pourch was a dream and not something that actaculy happened
I drunkenly called my ex on Skype last night and didn't talk, just smiled real big at him until I fell asleep.
BTW I totally understand panda express being popular amongst the highs. I can feel the shrimp being slaughtered in my mouth. It's fantastic.
Yeah, tell that to my thumb. Cause it was up my ass all night waiting for you.
Correction: Jimmy johns. The one pita pit employee has been an asshole to me ever since you locked them out of the store
i have two papers due tomorrow. contemplating if i should take adderall in my anus for full effects
i think i puked but i couldve been a dream and i may have madeout with a 20 something guy infront of my managers...also possible dream.
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