just went home with some hot chick. she has posters of the jonas brothers in her room. i basically ran out of the house.
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
It's just like the Real World with babies
What can i say, inner beauty is great but it makes a hard picture to jack off to
Just mindlessly walked into the mens bathroom. My vagina has now become its own independent being, looking for penises. I'm just along for the ride.
Meghan got a job at the bar. We're now morally obligated to drink. Is this what dreams are made of?
So some sort of safe sex group just flash mobbed the bar by putting condoms over people's beers.
They left screaming as a hale of lubbed up condoms rained into their hair.
i know it happened because it happened right beside me, and at one point on top of me.
Whatever, consider condoms an eighteen year investment.
I could probably save all of the money I would have spent on condoms and put a kid through college.
My suggestion is that you just get high and set shit on fire
I never thought people would keep their guns next to their fake plastic penises, but there they were.
It's cool dude. The dank is in the form of premade smores with honey grahm crackers, marshmallow cream and 420 brand choc. bars. NV weed laws have nothing on me.
He said he's going to karaoke tonight and I just spilled a bunch of Cheetos on the floor and ate them all. So that's my night.
His sister gave me the "if you hurt him I will break your neck" talk. I didn't know how to tell her we're not a couple.
Tomorrow has nothing to do with the threesome
I am the one with the vagina. I get to call it.
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