i did make 45 jello shots and that makes me feel more productive then any paper would
I don't care what you say, cheap wine does NOT taste better in expensive crystal...
Just made nachos out of string cheese and sunchips and laying in my bed watching babay einstion..get on my level
Just look for the house with the beer knights.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
I just melted my phone trying to make cookies. I think that's a sign.
Ive consumed more rum studying for law school finals than I did that time I fucked that fat chick in the back of VW Beetle. It's all ugly, but for different reasons.
He's single. I'm single. We should rekindle our eighth grade romance over a box of wine and carefree sex.
i could've stared at her spine forever man..she was so deep, and she made a drink out of vodka and organic mangoo shit. i will find her and present that goddess with some fucking gummies
you're no longer allowed out of my sight at parties
I have a boner in one of my pics with her which no one noticed.
well that's the third time this semester that I've projectile vomited walking to class in front of dozens of people
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
I give all credit to my lucky thong, there's never a time I haven't gotten laid while wearing it
I'd like to thank Vicodin for getting me through family thanksgiving once again.
I just watched a magician wearing a fedora deep throat a balloon\n
Randomize