she'd have to be at LEAST a cup size bigger for me to even consider putting up with her voice
First coke bust down the road. Spring is finally here.
i will trade you pizza and a blowjob for a fifth of vodka.
do i get to eat the pizza while you give me the blowjob?
Josh has a goal of being naked in every RAs room this year. He's already 3/11.
It's gonna be ok. As we grow older we sometimes lose sight of what's important to us. Like safe sex. And standards.
You wanna get laid? Be a female for once and stop bending nails to impress guys.
A dude I dated in high school just put a status about National Coming Out day. I checked his relationship status. He is dating a dude. Hello, Friday.
Got home & pissed on my moms carpet like a bear in the woods. I woke up to a picture message with me passed out on the floor with my pants down & hands covering my face. I've had an awkward week
Dealing with people is so much easier after you've had an orgasm or 4.
It was a good hour of moans, penis compliments, smacks, and what sounded like someone running in flip flops
I hate being on my period . Did you know that by the time I'm 30 I would've wasted 1,176 days of my life I could've had sex but couldn't bc I was on my period.
so i showed up to the bars in a sombrero and a tie as a headband... so yeah, they didn't let me in
Her vag MUST be made out of starbursts or something equally as delicious.
Can you imagine doing supermarket sweep in a sex store? What's the sex store equivalent of a whole ham?
She climbed in my window blew me and left. She's in my phone as the blow job fairy
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