I mean I can't believe yesterday ended w/ your house getting firebombed. What an unexpected turn of events
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
These people need to leave so I can have rum and Doritos at work like every other American.
Well his aunt was in the next room so we had to be quiet. I felt like i was on an episode of silent library.
Im still in bed and cant move and i only had Two beers and a shot last night... how did I make it in college?
God gave us a 4 year grace period.
Ok I have to ask, whose idea was it to used crushed up norcos as margarita salt? And what did they say to convince everybody else to think it was a good idea?
He specifically said I couldn't post the picture of him passed out naked except for a strategically placed washcloth. Where's the fun in that?
YOU'RE MARRIED. TO OTHER PEOPLE.
A fair warning: I don't think a cop will let you off the hook just because your birthday is on New Year's Eve
This hangover is what we deserve after that level of debauchery.
You know for a guy who frequently jumps into stuff without thinking it through, your can do spirit is lacking on this one
I tried to avoid catching feelings but then he took me out to breakfast
its weird getting into a political debate with a pony dressed as an anime character online
My girlfriend is so strong now. Like on the one hand its kind of hot because she can pin me down during sex, but on the other hand she picked me up and carried me bridal style at the company bbq.
I legitimately just had to leave work because I am too hungover. The front office ladies keep making fun of me.
is caitlin alive?
ya she's alive she's watching a movie
ok remind her she drank toilet water then.
Randomize
