just do it
fine only cuz shes asian
im pretty sure there are laws against slapping prostitutes
i'm pretty sure there are laws against prostitutes.
He asked me if I "almost moaned"
i got totally wasted at 2pm and cleaned the house bc i was bored. my mom now supports my alcohol problem
part of it is the fact that im problem drinking, and the other part is my OCD wont let me leave the bottle half-empty.
just gave a yankee's fan wrong directions to Fenway....welcome to boston asshole
I wrote and sealed my mom's mothers day card last night while intoxicated.. should i put it in the maibox
without a question
I just got cut off for correcting the bartender's grammar. I should have never accepted that fucking editors position.
Get over here. It's an emergency. Just realized I haven't hd my mouth on a penis in two weeks. Get over here.
Literally been drinking for 10 hours. Hammered. Roasted chestnuts fell out of my shirt earlier.
Also I hooked up with a trainer at my gym. Between her, the married chick, and the bartender, my life is becoming a bad porn plot.
I dunno that I'd be trusting enough of junkyard tequila to drink it.
There's a kitten on my face and I'm druuuunk
Is it in poor taste to drop acid before midnight mass?
I love this.
No I will not paint you for Mardi Gras in town. It is going to rain and you don't need another ID charge
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