WTF why am I in the Atlanta airport?
Just try to lay there and not be pregnant.
he let me duct tape his mouth because i said it was my fetish, i really just wanted him to shut up
where did this taco bell managers name tag come from ?
In fact, not a good idea to go into any house alone after a man invites you in from his balcony.
You fell asleep with your fingers in my vagina. You made this a relationship.
I'm pretty sure blacking out is a coping mechanism.
I'm sorry and I love you. One day we're going to live in a whore mansion with our babies and make boys cry.
He got kicked out 3 times. I have no idea how he kept getting back in. I saw him walking on the highway the next morning.
The only way I can describe this shit is male aloe vera plant in both looks and feel its standing in the toilet
Thanks for that....my girlfriend picked up my phone and saw that
Great. Now I have to produce, edit and leak a sex tape before Saturday. Fundraising is hard.
Strip club, what strip club did I eat a steak at? That's the appropriate question
Last night you were prentending to be a broom stick...you were laying on the floor and humming the Harry potter song.
Apparently I showed all your grooms men my vagina to prove I did not have underwear on. Awesome
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Randomize
