you didnt say anything until i brought it up today. i guess i misjudged your maturity.
I guess I misjudged your gender.
why did i wake up with a kid named Raphael in my bed this morning?
I dont know but you did call last night to tell me you found the last ninja turtle
I just followed up on a noise complaint...only to find 2 girls in bikinis covered in jello with beer cans everywhere. I couldn't bring myself to bust that party.
I want to be a cop.
I've replaced the bottom of the food pyramid with alcohol.
hey, i'm all for honesty but let's not get carried away
When I try to close my eyes ibwant to puke. Going to the basement to watch pocohantas. That'll keep myeyes open. And puke free.
He told me he felt like he shoud say thank you and as a prize i could keep anything from his room that i wanted.
I just looked at the guy in the car next to me and he was wearing a divers mask. We just nodded cause we both understood.
Someone was asleep on the couch next to us and woke up. We paused and he yelled "gentlemen, behold! Sex!"
Ummm Im the uneducated alcoholic of the group... if I say its a bad idea, its probably a bad idea.
I happen to have lost a black t-shirt and the volume button from my phone last night. If anyone finds it. You know what to do.
I just had sex in the men's bathroom of a Chinese buffet...
YOU ARE MY HERO
Fun thought: I realized the thing I miss most about him is dixie kong's double trouble on his super Nintendo. It's possible that I don't have a soul.
He just flipped the beer pong table and set the ceiling fan on fire things are about to get crazy
Hey. I hope you have enough room in your car for me and a Honda civic front bumper.
Randomize
