i fuckib htae you, you church bitch.
I'm not really sure actually. until I fell in love with a boy (which was just a few weeks ago) I thought my attraction to men was purely physical.
so you were gay...and then you realized you were EVEN MORE gay
i had the all of mcdonalds chanting USA as he motorboated you
And yes, in case u were wondering a 25 year old high school agriculture teacher did just hit on me At Walmart bc of my pinata
why oh why did i suck thise tits. nothing but trouble fuuuuuu
Sometime between a drunk guy asking me if I'm a Beach person or a lake person WHILE HIS HAND WAS IN HIS FUCKING PANTS or breaking up a lady fight over peewee football league I started to reevaluate my life and self
Dude he was a used car salesman for his friends' penises. I know I have something here that's right for you!
Going to a professional golf course at 2am to throw the flag poles like javelins
We're going to work out tomorrow I guess but it usually consists of doing weights for 10 minutes, then saying fuck cardio and going to Taco Tuesday
THIS IS WHY I WENT TO SCHOOL FOR TO BE A COSMETOLOGIST TO HELP MY EX BOYFRIENDS CURRENT GIRLFRIEND BE MILDLY ATTRACTIVE... Everything DOES happen for a reason
I wish you could see all the crumbs in my bra....it looks like Hansel & Gretel got lost in my cleavage.
This is seriously fucking awkward. My favorite sex scene just started and my dad's still here. He offered me Cheetos.
We almost got stabbed in the nuts last night. Don't worry, we're alright.
Only I would get an underage 24 hours before turning 21.
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
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