i effin hate jeff goldbloom.
but i totally would still bang him
I just saw Ann slam dunk her puke bag into a trash can on Avenue A. You ladies might want to consider putting the Patron shots down and going home.
Blowing lines off from the book where the wild things are... bad babysitter?
so i woke up in some guy's bed but then i realized i can atone for this tomorrow
So where are we on this whole, you write my paper...i do sexual favors situation?
I've started grabbing my boobs in front of my lesbian philosophy professor so she'll give me a better grade. It's working...
THAT WAS PROBABLY MY ONE CHANCE TO SLEEP WITH A MAN NAMED BORIS AND YOU RUINED IT.
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
They were taking shots out of the caps of perfume bottles. This is too much for me.
My team for a project is gonna have weekly meetings at a bar. yessss. they will do all the work while i thor hammer down beers.
the last time I drank tequila I ended up riding your skateboard nude down the street... so yeah, I'll have a few shots.
Can we table this discussion? The roommate is out of town and I have to eat pie on the couch in my underwear.
Me saying I wish i was a better person + me pretending I don't want to fuck on my period = me lying
Today I learned that I have a bigger dick than Draymond Green
you yelled, puked and cried then passed out in the fetal position in your underwear
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