like if someone fucked a dictionary but instead of having a penis, it was just one of those leap frog educational toys
I hope to god you are high
Public safety found my id!
And i can't find my bra so i'm assuming they found my bra with my id which would explain the disapproving tone the lady on the phone had.
the last 2 times weve had drunk sex ive had to get the morning after pill.. he's turning into a real expensive fuck buddy.
We're about to have a bottle rocket fight on jetskis. You have 5 minutes to get on our level.
That's just weird. That doesn't make sense sexually at all. I mean, you might as well tape a pen to the tip and try and write your name while you're at it.
It all went downhill when I figured out I could launch myself into people with my crutches
I feel as if I need Plan B just being in the same room as them for more than 5 minutes.
So many weird people in this class. I can practically taste their unwanted virginities. They taste bad.
He gave me a script of norcos and touched my balls so overall it's been a good day.
just passed my midterm while getting a blow job. i love going to school online
Dude I just realized i did a camper walk of shame in front of amish people. I should have asked for cheese and a home made pie to cover it up. Im just lost shopping in amish country nothing to see here
He fed me Girl Scout cookies while I was still tied up...what did I do right?
My lash glue is stronger than my sense of self respect
He just stopped in the middle of undressing for sex to dip his slice of pizza in ranch. I think I’m in love.
She tied me to the bed and did lines off my chest before sex. I’m going to put that on my bucket list just so I can cross it off
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