Do you think Capital One would let me put the Tub Girl picture on my Capital One card?
Beat you to it.
Literally like 10 people walking in my building talking about how much they hate draco
Last nIght I drank wIth the new guy from fellowshIp & my pastor I've known sInce I was 7. It was agreed by them that I had nIce tIts. I'm not weIrded out In fact I'm flattered...
we just did breakfast shots, I have a black eye and savage garden is on . Best weekend ever
oh my god. were standing in the kitchen and were chanting "EYEBROWS" and shaving peoples eyebrows. I have work tomorrow and want to keep my eyebrows.
He's coming back with me for the week. It took me saying "I don't wanna drive myself home... I'm better as a passenger giving road head" for him to jump at it. Rack another one up for my magical openings.
I'm doing homework tonight but if you end up going out drinking I would like one courtesy peer pressure text.
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
He put his hand in my cleavage. NOT ON. IN. BETWEEN. NO more gingers
Made a holiday JibJab of all my fucks. How's your night?
He's practically not my boyfriend anymore. So let's go get some glitter, balloons, alcohol and forget this night ever happened.
Balls deep in an Orange is the New Black marathon. Bring food and drugs.
I hooked up with a guy that had a beard last night felt like I was building a fucken log cabin
Dude your life.. At your sugar daddies house sending nudes to your fwb
I just opened my travel toothbrush holder and it smelled like vodka...maybe a vodka cranberry. This says a lot about my vacations.
Randomize
