So just talked to them hahah i like that people sat there and watched as you two made out... They said they even had to refill their beers
Writing a book: The Evolution of the Douche Bag: From Popped Collars to Ed Hardy Shirts. Doing research now.
Make sure you include chapters on white sunglasses, spray tans, and toxic amounts of hair gel.
I just recorded courtney puking and set it as my ringtone.
Why is there not a 'day after acid' genre. Or even a pandora station or something.
remind me again why lemons and alcohol in the crock pot is a bad idea?
Yes, that was ME getting carried out of the club singing 'i believe i can fly'
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
I blew him and did charles barkley impressions at the same time. what a pro
I wanna give a stern lecture to whoever invented pants cause they are hard right now
I literally was just rolling on the ground and said to her 'this is what dying looks like'
Is it festive if I masturbate to Santa porn?
It's amazing how hard it it while drunk to not comment "fuck you" on dumb peoples' statuses
Taking dicks and breaking hearts, no better life
im looking at the positives. number one it stopped me from hooking up with vince infront of his girl, number two it gave me something to do instead of throwing up and number three i fuckin rocked his world
Hypothetically speaking of course, is it bad if a cat eats lube?
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