It's a miracle Ok Typing texts toYou right now
I looooooove Saturdays!!!!!!!
I am absolutely hammered
So how come you never look me in the eyes anymore when we make love?
he called me a worthless slut and then went 2 the bathroom 2 pee on the floor before leavin. but he was really hot and he left his jacket, should i call him?
He should be on Bizare Foods after who he ate last night
My relationship with VH1 is so bittersweet
neither the pictures you took nor my hangover explain why there are skittles in my shoe
You were sad because he was "taking it out on the plant"
I am burnt. Have a black eye. Face dove into the grass and got pissed on. Time of my life. God Bless the USA.
I love our strategizing... I wish we used the same passion for planning our lives and future that we use for planning our drunken escapades... We would both be doctors by now, I swear
I've had to much cheese to give a fuck about anything. im tired.
You're fucking beautiful as shit and we should have loving sex...
Day 1 of the Fuck Your Ex weekend has been productive. Already boned Steph and we're both still glad we arnt together anymore.
I just need to find a good handlebar mustache to sit on until I'm over that beard
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
Accidentally drunk dialed my mom last night. Started the conversation with "Where you at girl?"
Randomize
