I might be drunk enough to make out with you. You don't want to miss this unique opportunity.
I'm going to take the bottles back.. And maybe get an x-ray
he was CRYING into my vagina
Margaritas ran out of lime juice. Substituted Jaeger. Jaegerita not good.
Yeah. Fortunately, the road to Hell is paved with naked 21 year old girls.
Which beats the fuck out of good intentions.
well the hot one passed out so thats that, but then the fat one made chicken nuggets....totally worth it
i think that dennys waitress has my boxers
Do you think i can prewrite an apology on friday and leave it vague enough to just finish on sunday?
In a weird way, I don't want to stalk him on Facebook. I want to find out what's wrong with him the old-fashioned way. Is this what it means to be romantic?
I've never danced to a Michael Jackson song in a bar and left alone bro. Something in girls loves a guy who dances to mj
Nothing like an alcohol-fueled, 6-hour-long hunt for weed--complete with occasional breaks for sex.
But he does seem to be getting proper humping etiquette down. So there's progress.
I'M SO LONELY THAT I TEXTED THE FRESHMAN
just call my name and ill be there, if we are puking, beating up bitches, or pickin up men, OR avoiding wierd men, so many situations require a wingman
if by making eggnog you mean drinking all the spiced rum, then yes, she's making eggnog
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