Nob stitches i do do not bleed anymorr!
Have introduced beer-pong to my work's Tuesday lunches.
Part of my whole not being a slut anymore involves not giving other peoples boyfriends blowjobs
I do what I can to inject something into your life every day. Today, humor. Saturday. Penis.
HE IS COURTING ME WITH CHINESE FOOD AND IT IS WORKING.
Just bought koolaid for my vodka in a DARE shirt with my NES wallet. I'm everything I thought I'd be when I was 8.
Except even better, boobs get discounts.
And one night I got way too drunk and thought he said call me a polish name so I called him Konrad. Now he thinks I cheated on him with a Konrad.
That's my new pick up line call me a polish name
Gotcha. How bad is it?
Well to compare it to something I would say it what's that walls would like inside the primate exhibit at the zoo after a group of monkeys finished throwing feces at each other all afternoon
We were wearing togas. So having sex was really easy to do without taking any clothes off.
Ok. I'm gonna smoke some weed and look at some elephants without you then.
Will you be doing the frenzied booty dance of passionate ownage on my penis tonight
That was just an endearing nickname I called you before. I'm not gonna call you a filthy slut now that you are one, I don't want to hurt your feelings.
Science requires me to take a picture of your nipples.
I know this shouldnt be a problem, but there are too many women hitting on me. I dont know what to do
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
Randomize
