Is it a little weird that I have a ridiculous urge to have sex while the theme song to the Pirates of the Carrbibbean blares in the background?
I guess there's some 16 and under softball tournament and they all are at my work. what is a 21 year old to do?
The responsible thing...show them the break room.
I just saw a man vacuming his front lawn. What is this world coming to?
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
She checked into foursquare right as she left work so he would think she was there late and not on some other guy's dick
I have to say for barely passing high school, that girl is a genius.
You'll be happy to know that I did indeed fracture my rib in a sex related injury
Judging by what she did last night, I would say at least 4 of them have mono now.
I only made out with him because he cured my hiccups
Thankfully US customs doesnt have a checkbox for bringing semen into the country because my hair would still be in CDC quarantine
He just asked me to be his girlfriend while having sex on his parents kitchen counter
After fooling around at the hotel til dawn, I managed to feed her with my free buffet passes. Tastes like sweet victory.
I'm a full-grown woman and thusly I expect my sphincters to behave themselves.
I'm not too sure what happened last night, but by the looks of it, we must have gotten drunk with zebras.
Woke up at 5am in an elevator... Pretty much tells you how my weekend went.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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