you kept talking about how hot andy milinakis is and the things you would do with him. no more tequila from him.
I wish sober me loved running as much as drunk me...
We could make it a date. Dinner and a show. The show being my nipples getting pierced.
I JUST WANT TO WATCH PORN BUT THE CAT IS JUST SITTING HERE LICKING HIS BALLS. I CAN'T DO IT.
Dude. I knoww what ur thinking. Yes, your hand hurts. It's because you fell through a window. If and when you wake up, go to the hospital.
Rick Santorum just suspended his campaign. Lets celebrate by watching gay pornography together.
It feels like I'm being stabbed in the uterus with a rake. That night was totally worth it though. Thanks.
The plan is that you eat an edible first, then pressure your dad to do one. You know you are down.
Some girl just ordered Chinese delivery to her therapy appointment...
Well the other day she asked me how often I jerk off. So I guess things are getting semi-serious
Every time we have sex, I feel his dick ramming my soul into submission. Problem is..... I LIKE THAT SHIT!
Last night you dunked donut holes in spinach dip, ate it, threw up, and continued eating. I cant keep up with your drunk eating skills.
I was wondering where the donuts went.
I drank Dr. Pepper and instant breakfast mix together and threw up sober for the first time.
Well... Chad blew off half of his hand last night. We were able to find most of it.
Tonight I totally got eaten out in the old school photo booth in the mall. Will send you pics of the photo reel asap
Randomize
