i wants your nipples near my face. PLEASE????
Marg and I just meaowed the nat anthem. I was tenor.
'm tripping baaaaaaaaaaaaaaas
what is TOTES MCGOATS in spanish?
"I never want to have to say, 'Please don't squirt me with your breast milk' again.
He was spoon feeding me wine all night.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
We are two peas in an std pod
You haven't puked in my sink in over a year.. Youre coming over this weekend
Euphemism? No, "pantsless vodka yoga" is a legitimate pastime of mine
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
He makes me want to shower. It must be love.
N.C. cops just used a megaphone to tell me I have a slutty outfit. My life is complete.
Lets go hit some boners bro!
I appreciate the acceptance and inclusion, but that's not how we gay men talk.
I'm home, and it turns out she didn't get it all. still picking Oreos out of my pubes.
I could drive to your house and kick you in the nuts right now....and not even stop for a burrito
Randomize
