Just checked, might have creepy crawlies. What does chlamydia feel like? Not near wireless to consult webMD.
seems the shocker is way more shocking if u get the fingers wrong
i told him im from Canada, abortion is free
Cure to hiccups..road head..high five
And as you crawled into the bathroom last night you repeatedly said "I know the routine".
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
If I can't get a one-legged man to love me, what the hell chance do I have with a NORMAL guy???
I don't know. I guess at the end of the day I wanted taco bell more than a boyfriend.
Totally get that.
I realized I'm gonna have to fit cheating on my gf, sleeping with my gf and having dinner with her parents all into one Sunday evening
We play this game where we catch up on what we missed over five years of not talking to eachother, then we have sex like nothing ever happened.
Just delivered a pizza to a holiday inn and a delivery driver from Me n Ed's walked up at the same time, we both were going to the same floor so we stood in the elevator making small talk about delivery stuff, but a small part of me wanted to deck him, stand over him and shout,"FOR THE HUT MOTHERFUCKER, FOR THE HUT!"
Jesus christ, don't start a pizza delivery gang war.
Do you know how hard it is to give a bj in your dead grandmothers car
dude, I felt like being high in a Santa hat and eating five boxes of cookies was right for today.
There are some people who should not be trusted with a cell phone while drunk. You know your one of them when you call the cops on your own party.
He did a backflip because drugs
Randomize
