So it turns out the white chocolate in the bathroom is actually soap
I'm destined to be knocked up by a sailor
I've blown him so many times I feel like I have a better relationship with his dick than I do with him.
I ended up on the roof were calling it a tie
You have all been randomly chosen to participate in a new game called: how high was I? If you have any information about this or about where my clothing items went give me a shout. Thanks an good luck.
At least I'm doing lines with a notecard. That counts for something right
How do I say "I still wanna hook up w you but I don't wanna see your penis via text ever again" through a snapchat
Face washed and sleeping pill taken. Here's hoping for a more sex filled tomorrow.
I think my ph in my vagina is actually off from the lack of sex I've had this break compared to finals week.
You keep talking about hotdogs and yelling "COME ON DOWN, LET ME SEE WHAT YOU'RE WEARING"
I have a txt file I don't remember making open on my desktop. All it says is "what it's like to be a bat"
Can someone explain to me why guys are so fascinated w their dicks that they feel like they'll die if they don't send unsolicited dick pics
WHY DID I MAKE A 7 minute video of me eating crackers and cheese when I was high
Send it to me
I just took like 30 condoms from the doctors office... no one can say I don't try to save my money.
Right before he dumped me... he got a really ugly pair of pants. They were twill pants. A pinkish color. When I'm sad... I picture him in them. It makes me smile.
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