i'm in the sorta mood where i wanna be that crying, drunk girl who will hook up with anyone that tells her she's pretty
Car fucking is for special occasions like birthdays and bank holidays. Don't want to lose the magic by making it an everyday thing.
were trying to schedule when i can give him head in between classes.
We found her hiding in the bath tub.. And when i opened the curtain she replied "thank you" and walked out like nothing happened.
Your last day of twenties? OK. Then I'll give you til midnight. Then you turn into a pumpkin. A big, 30 year old pumpkin.
The night started going downhill when I set my foot on fire.
Purse pizza: the pizza you buy before the club, and you eat on the train home. I thought you knew me by now!
I saw that you sent me a photo and the first thing out of my mouth was "I swear if it's another photo of a dick poking out of a bubble bath"
I'm a drunk white girl and my ancestors were drunk white girls, if we apologized our species would be extinct.
I may have had sex with him and told him we wasn't worth my time then went home and made mashed potatoes
The bong is packed and it's taco Tuesday come over
I was christened with Fireball shots by some guy at the bar. I'm practically Jesus now.
I think my life is a one-way ticket to blackout city.
It took me twenty minutes to read that sentence.
All I said was okay...
For a second fuck I think last night went extremely well... our sexual relationship is progressing at a pace that im quite satisfied with.
Randomize
