The woman exiting the men's room tried convincing me she was actually a good-looking man.
whatever. i don't care. i just want to be drunk wrapped in an american flag.
Printed off fake 'Producer' Sundance badges for us. Pretty sure they double as free passes for getting laid by 'actresses'. Testing this theory tonight.
i also took my stockings off in the bathroom and blew my nose with them in the cab ride home. james was appalled
Sunshine is the equivalent of sprinkling whore pellets on campus.
Don't feel bad sweetie, you're not the only classy one in town. I'm still driving around with that tupperware of tequila in my cup holder from last week's Margarita Monday.
Chilling. The soap was talking at one point if I rememeber right...
Wake your ass up this is a day of horror where we get horroibly drunk and sleep with tandom dudes who wish they were super heros ps i havr stuffed animals over my privates im a petting zoo this year
I missed rounds this morning...my senior resident hooked me up to and IV and made me stay in the clinic because he said I didn't look presentable enough to walk around the hospital
It is a bad day indeed when you learn that your boy toy looks better in your dresses than you do
She was dressed as a banana and told me that I needed more potassium in my diet. Of course I went down on her.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
I need you to teach me how to be roommates with somebody I'm not fucking.
Remember the time you puked your contact lens out?
Don't be weirded out, but my bondage straps are made of my ex boyfriend's curtains
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