He wouldn't know what to do with his penis even if they made a "how to get a blowjob for dummies" guide
She is a fish and this place is a barrel. I can play this game.
He asked what my name was on facebook chat. IT SAYS RIGHT THERE. i will never be drunk enough for this guy.
Either way, he made a blog for his cat.
She bit a glass in half.
I am a human short and spout . Here is my jager Herr is my redbull . When i get real drink i shout out. Tip me over and pour yeager out
Bonding with my year old cousin over the fact that we both shit ourselves. Babysitting like a bosss
I LOVE YOU SO MUCH I'M ON A WILD DICK CHASE FOR YOU. How many lesbians do YOU know that would do that? HOW MANY????
We can't BOTH have terrible sex lives. Get fucked or throw him out.
Me hangover (as projected). That sounds like a plan. Ill do it for Mexico
You're a Heat fan? You lose any chance blowjob bc of your poor choice.
Turns out I screen transfered my streaming trucker restroom porn vid to the downstairs neighbors'TV instead of my own, damn you chromecast
I'm kinda sad I'm leaving the bank. I never got to have rough sex in the vault.
It's only awkward the first ten minutes you realize it's not your house.
It's only 3 AM. There's still time to get arrested today.
Randomize
