Where??
Against the wall. In corner. Only gave him head though don't worry
Well, she opened the door to puke outside the car, but she threw it open so hard it popped back and hit her in the face.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
We were just at different life stages. He wanted to get married and have kids, I wanted to take MDMA and fuck my roommate.
My last two google searches are "shiny things" and "Ohio consent laws." you should visit more often.
I went home with a guy last night because he showed me some magic tricks and kept shouting "THEY'RE ILLUSIONS MICHAEL!"
Not good... He ate my chips. Thats not a sex analogy for anything. My actual potato chips... gone. I lost on both ends.
We need to make boob twerking a thing. I feel like that's why vine was invented
He seems like a lot more than a waste of tequila
The power of my boobs compel you
Puked in the trash can. Took a bite of someone's breadstick and kept dancing and drinking
He passed out in my car.
What's the problem?
HE'S STILL IN MY FUCKING CAR.
My ex unfollowed me on SPOTIFY bruh. Freaking spotify. The butthurt is real
Idk but when you think about it the last time I did bottomless mimosas I ended up getting my nipples pierced so it might be fair
Guess whose grandma smokes weed?
Randomize
