I went to blockbuster, where I always go when I need to soul searching
Despondent, hopeless, I decide on vantage point, because I vaguely resemble matthew fox (let me believe this, please)
It was cheaper to buy then rent, so now I'm stuck w/ a wretched hangover and I own this shit movie
I had to get a ride home from that girl that slept with 3/4 of the band
Tried to buy Xanax from my boss last night. Wrong Mike.
i really care about you, respect you, another gay word, and another gay word... lets just drink
I need to stop drinking. Side note- we have a party bus tonight. So the drinking will have to end after that
As long as you're naked and covered in glow paint, I'm there.
I don't remember anything that happened last night past 10.. I made him buy me a Buckeye's Donut tshirt. I have no idea why he'd want to fuck me after that.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
The guys in the quick check just recognized me as the girl who bought rolling papers and whipped cream. This is the walk of shame on crack.
In case you're wondering what I'm doing, I'll be banging an 18 year old this weekend. Repeatedly.
P.s. I loved that your balls smelled like coconut
god dammit I AM NO LONGER PUTTING UP WITH YOUR HETEROSEXUALITY I QUIT
... drunk me broke the coffee table?
STOP TALKING ABOUT YOURSELF IN THE THIRD PERSON. YOU DID THE THING.
She told me I was absolutely not allowed to sleep with him even though she knows I'm a rule breaker who loves a good challenge.
You should have thought of that before emitting walrus sounds while intoxicated
Randomize