I was in a gas station that sold tazers and I just saw a billboard that said "Strippers, need we say more?" God I love Georgia!
I just had to explain to my father, how having two screens plugged into my computer doesn't use more internet.
he said it was like fucking a big sack of slut potatoes
No, this is a senior booty call. It cannot be ignored.
i don't know man, last time i saw her she was applying sunblock to her vagina
I'm going to go out on a limb and say last night was a success, also the neighbors are counting down the days until we move out.
Logically he should not be walking around...after that fall he should be in a hospital in a medically induced coma
Packing a mid day bowl in the Sonic parking lot. Have I gone too stoner?
The first guy I ever sexted is having a baby.. Is this what adulthood feels like?
People try and tell me I never learn me lesson, well that's a bunch of crap. I asked for Monday off for Superbowl recovery based on my experience last year.
Fuck you. You were a total asshole last night.
We will get to that, but can anybody tell me whose fucking socks I am wearing?!
Do you think if I had a tempurpedic bed he would still be able to feel me fingering myself after we have sex?
My parents are now taking hits off a joint. Thank you.
So I took a screenshot of my boarding pass and the TSA agent somehow swiped it to the next photo. Yep...TSA saw my dick before I even went through the body scanner.
I a very close black and white picture of my slightly erect penis and I blew it up put it in an art gallery for a show coming up and somebody bought it for 30 Grand!!!
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