So im pretty sure the object of my emotional onterest is tired of playing with me....
found a new level of pathetic. i watched a guy pick out cigarette butts from a jar that weren't completely finished. make sure you go somewhere in life.
How come ATM is perfectly acceptable, yet not washing your hands after you poo is socially reprehensible?
watching espn. realized that the exact place those sportcenter guys are is where I got laid on the beach last superbowl. my sex spot is broadcasted nationwide
what started as sign language exam pre-drinks to calm the nerves turned into me waving at a deaf woman for 20 minutes
and then the entire party sang the national anthem a capella around the keg.
You drunk invited us to do an intervention for you.
We're past the whole "Did she just try to finger my ass?" Stage. Now it's encouraged.
I'm promising sexual favors in return for his responsible life decisions. Now THIS is growing up.
I'm drinking wine alone, eating leftovers, and cleaning my sex toys. For the love of god, do not graduate.
Just had Jager bombs for breakfast with her roommate... I do not regret this newfound lesbianism.
If you make 120 dollars and I walk instd of drive and don't eat or smoke this week we can pay rent
Are you kidding me????? How bout, IM SORRY FOR CALLING YOU 16 TIMES AND LEAVING YOU A TWO MINUTE VOICEMAIL OF MYSELF THROWING UP.
I'm not going to be your wingman while you are in the hospital.
See, this is why you don't do nice things for people. You'll get stuck in the snow and you won't catch a dick.
Randomize