Maybe if you date her you can take a dump on her
i think guys who wear condoms are gentleman.
did u get his digits?
yes his name is chazbangbangbang according to my phone...
He's tryingto open a beer with a Police baton. Cut him off or see where this leads?
Yeah, well I just made $600 while taking a shut cause two diff clients called while I was in here. Tell me being a lawyer doesn't kick ass.
Trying to grind with crutches was not a success
I'm just saying. If this how my magic vagina shows it's magic then I don't want any
You just yell-acapella'd the theme to fresh prince of bel air to me while a different song is playing in the bar.
I mean, unless you wanna just let me lie there while you fuck me and pour water into my mouth
I asked him if we could switch positions so I could watch the Olympics... I'd say date number two is a miss
I'm still alive btw, in case you were worried about my well being.
if people come over to pregame will you hide my Oreos
For someone who claims to be straight, she knows a hell of a lot about bi erasure, and one Hayley Kiyoko song too many
You're so sweet in the most vulgar ways
So in hindsight, going through the McDonald's drive thru plastered at 4 a.m. on stolen bikes was a bad idea.
Randomize