I regularly think about how cool your nickname is
have you ever noticed that homeless people never have acne. suck it proactive
Should I tell Kevin that my finger was in his sister's ass last night?
doooooooo herrrrrrrrr
I'm out of practice. be my yoda
put your penis in her you must.
That's why Kanye is a gay fish.
I had fun last year but I was one half of the hoe train back then. At least I'll feel better about myself as a person this year.
I'm going to miss going to the strip club though.
my mom found me passed out in the kitchen floor with the Brita pitcher.. Happy Mothers Day
I HOPE YOU ENJOY THIS VDIEPO BECAUSE I AMS ENDIONG A LOKT OF EFFORT RECORIDNG IT
I ONLY PARTIALLY KNOW WHAT YOU SAID. BUT I THINK I WILL LIKE IT.
I effort
The guy had great intentions when throwing us free beer off the balcony... but of course I was the one to get hit in the face because that's the kind of luck I have
Hey, so I'm not coming into work til Friday. Some guy I've known for about 8 hours just offered me a free vacation to Maui and bought my plane ticket. He's Aussie so I'm 75% sure he won't murder me
Please call us Steph is okay but missing phone wallet tooth
No. You don't want this. When I threw up last night, it was so intense I went blind for about 3 seconds.
I'm eating pizza in the bathtub
she said she doesn't remember seeing me at all last night. ...I was with her for six hours, there's no way she could have been blackout the whole time
Well, we went shopping. He bought me starbucks and ate me out in the change room at target. If that isnt the best post covid first date, I don't know what is
Randomize