Thats something to write home to mom about
Dear Mom, I had sex last nt w a girl that liked to b choked. Im n love. Cant wait for you to meet her
Do you remember last night at all? Be honest
I need to look at the pictures on my camera to fill in the gaps.
Now I'm watching The History of Sex on the History Channel. They're talking about how repressed the 30s were. I think I understand why grandma is such an angry person.
She referred to her collection of sex toys as an "arsenal." I'm not sure whether to be scared or excited....
I couldnt bring myself to steal alcohol from my dead grandma
I am trying to figure out how to tell this kid i have a boyfriend in a way that still allows me to smoke free weed
As you were leaving the bar you grabbed a table and when they stopped you, you said "Its cool i came in with this". They did not believe you.
I'm wearing spiderman underwear, the question is what am I NOT capable of
so I ate shit in the bar and took a barstool down with me and this guy helped me up and I just started making out with him. I need to stop meeting men like that
Sorry, It's like OkCupid Olympics... categories: best sext, best dick pic, and most effort by ugly. You won gold in the last event if that makes you feel better.
I should not be allowed to reproduce. The world doesn't need my sarcastic asshole demon spawn in child form
He couldn't give me an orgasm, but he did give me a UTI.
The kitchen also doubles as a screaming room after midnight as long as you have something to muffle the sound
God help them if any millennials are in the vicinity. Rent is too high and we no longer fear death
hypothetically, what's the best method to remove an stray semen gob from a roommate's important school document?
Randomize
