Goodnight sugar queer
Sugar queer??
Why does my predictive text prioritize 'queer' over 'puffs'?
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
Woke up with a chicken parm sandwich in my clutch. Aaaand I'm eating it.
someone wrote on his wall: "congrats on your engagement"
I think you may want to look into that...
well its a long story but basically i overcame many cockblocks
If I ever mention marriage force me to Brazil to do coke and strippers until I die.
this mall makes me feel like I just rolled a 9 in jumanji and got the stampede card
Robert just walked in drunk, grabbed my Jameson from me, told me to let him do his thing, and spilled it all over the coffee table. Then he told me to grab a funnel because he was going home.
I need a full description of the guy I hooked up with. I don't think I ever saw his face
he seemed brazillian..
fuck.
I found my grandmother's vibrator, how was your day?
now that we broke up we are playing hot potato with the cock ring.. Poor thing just needs a home
driving home hungover today was like a life test..it was like the goblet of fire
I didn't want to fight, I just wanted to tell you to fuckoff.
gonna stay in tonight
and im a platypus. shotgun a beer and get your dick to this party. ive got some hot friends visiting
Bro I rebuilt the dungeon in animal crossing visit me
Broooo
Randomize
