Is it sad that I'm on the stopduiaz.com website and there is a cute boy but it will never work between us because hes in jail for 17.5 years?
Um.. is it mean if I say yes?
How would my first penpal letter even go? "Hey saw you on stopduiaz.com, sucks you killed that motorcyclist. Whats your favorite thing to do on the weekend?"
Im drinking a beer thats called vuuve which is boobs in begian. I think my life is complete.
My 8 year old wants to name our new cat "fur burger". how do i explain that this is not really appropriate?
I got an MIP via FUCKING HELICOPTER. Tuscaloosa police either have nothing to do or too many resources.
sorry for throwing an entire water bottle of vodka at you. It was very wasteful
I was unaware that a tutu and pasties was appropriate attire to this
P.S, i don't recommend doing keg stands on top of vehicles.
I just want to eat and sleep til I'm dead. I should've been born a cat.
How bad is it I'm looking at his cock while waiting to see my therapist?
2015 is a year for health and mental stability and alas we are not yet there so yolo
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
I'm very disappointed that your kitten almost ate my weed cake...
Yeahh. im on the phone with him drunk. he told me he found a pigeon in a cardboard box and named it quincy...
Should I put the spider I likely swallowed in my sleep into my calorie tracker?
My boobs are too perky to pay that much for a car
Randomize
