i also saw a trio of peacocks walking along a sidewalk in hollywood today. i really hope im not tripping.
david just texted me. reply with photo of genitalia? y/n
i've never been more proud of someone than i was when he told me he got his first blowjob at age 13...from two chicks
I'm actually pretty neutral about a lot of things. I'm like Switzerland with a penis.
hes a soccer player too.. you'd think he has better penis eye coordination
Yes, you can 69 in a fiat. But I think I have permanent nerve damage
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
The only explanation I can think of is that he still likes me. Which gives me an enormous amount of power over him and makes me laugh with malicious intent.
Cleaning naked can be dangerous. Vacuum cord got stuck on my belly button ring...
Hey I consider Sunday's trip to the ER a success. You're alive and now you know for sure you're not pregnant. I got my highest ever Tetris score. Wins all around.
Seltzer and cocaine. Life is flawless right now.
Since when do my one night stands start sending you friend requests?
When creating your wedding guest list do you put the girl you & your fiance had a threesome with under your friends or his friends?
He set the tone in the back of his car by blasting Marvin Gaye's sexual healing before railing me
It's official, I'm not staying in tonight
What caused that decision?
You only live once
Randomize
