Small Doughy Asian men and sleeveless hoodies with nothing underneath do not mix well.
Sounds like the climatic scene of my favorite erotic novel.
Report just came out that Tim Tebow is a virgin but I have proof he is not. He's bent Florida State over the last four years in a row.
Having an 'SDSU Mom' sticker is just like say 'Hi, my daughter has an std"
Apparently faking a threesome isn't as much fun as you'd think
If fate has that penis in my future.....I'm down.
It was going well until he told me about the 7k he made in college to be in a gay porn
Hey, can you come over and kill me real quick
Haha jealous. If I could remember my dreams I'm pretty sure they would constantly be about being drunk in foreign countries
i just want to attach a dildo to the ceiling and ride it like a gay spiderman.
Hey! Welcome back! How was the bachelorette in Vegas?
A safari of penis I hurt to the core
Gramp just called her sex-on-a-stick. AKA HE CALLED HER A WHORE. My 75 year old grandfather just called your ex's new thing a whore.
Don't take advice from me. I'm simultaneously shitting and eating cheesecake.
I came back from England with a face tattoo and the only thing anyone can talk about is my beard.
We could probably bang our way to enlightenment. However acid helps.
He sang the chorus to “Inside of you” by Russel Brand in Forgetting Sarah Marshall as he proceeded to not pull out...
Honestly? I wouldn’t even be mad, that probably took talent
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