jack dropped his pants and said "bet u've never seen a dick this big." which was really sad cuz i had never actually seen one that small...you have like pinch it between ur thumb and pointer finger to give a HJ
One reason I feel like garbage: Kraft single wine shots
So I commented on one of his pictures "who do I have to give a full effort blow job to, to get the Ides of March movie poster behind you" he responded with a number that wasn't his. I still texted it. I love that movie.
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
My reasons for going are selfish. She just opened her own law firm. I figure having a lawyer as a friend is a good idea. Nothing in my life suggests I won't need a lawyer again.
You told me "I need to pound this drinks if I'm going to pretend his dick is big enough" then left. Dollar night quotes 2012
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
I'm taking a dab in mourning of how long its been since I smoked with you guys.
You passed out and I didn't draw a penis on your face. Sister of the year.
I know he's only a bandaid for my emotional disrepair, but he can stick me anytime!!
I love you as a roommate, but you GOTTA start using the door dude..
I despise everything about her. Except her tits.
I just had sex with the kid I walked next to at my first holy communion
You said the best orgasm you ever had, you gave to yourself. your boyfriend looked really disappointed. so did half the room.
you came home and ate 12 bananas. you really didnt think mom would know you were high?
Randomize
