Do you ever creep on the girls you have banged and wondered how their walk of shame went?
The worst part is I think my tongue cut his penis and now he wont talk to me.
Give me one situation where peeing in your garage could be a bad idea
do you know what somber means? it's kinda the opposite of a kegstand
i literally paused in the middle of it, turned on my light, pointed to the picture netxt to my bed and go "you hooked up with my roommate too!!! AWWW!" he was so weirded out. i don't think he understands the relationship we have..we share..
How many times can I tell him I wasnt expecting sex before he realizes I'm just too lazy to shave all the time?
Now he's galloping around the bar. I don't know whether to laugh or cry.
I would say I am sorry for punching you last night, but I found the pictures you took on my camera and it all came rushing back.
I got kicked out because I puked again I'm on the fire truck outside
Of course the bar would go completely silent right as I yell out "I don't have AIDS"
Twas the night before the bachelor party, and all thru the house...not a creature was stirring, not even a stripper?...
He fed us edamame like baby birds. Slowly all coming back to me.
Pretty sure we're going to get a cease & desist notice from the Make A Wish Foundation, but until then...
He asked me how flexible I was and all I could think about was that time I threw my back out putting in a tampon.
Why did I wake up naked with a leg cramp and and extra $550 in my wallet?
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