Gayer than 8 guys blowing 9 guys
wow, that really makes you stop and think.
just started drinking the sprite you used to ice your crotch last night. Missing you already
The taxi driver was cool until you left. He then started blasting enya and telling me I look like I need another line.
You could give me a blowjob later? :)
I meant do something romantic..
Blowjob In the moonlight?
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
She just said, "are my livers going to die?"
How can I politely yet provocatively ask you for a cock shot?
So, last night I fell asleep sitting Indian-style on the floor, propped up against the front of the couch with an empty wine bottle in between my legs... How was your night?
We were sitting outside of the building and he literally just walked up with no pants on. This is the best college ever
It's funny because every time I go up and down the stairs it's an adventure. A A DRUNK ADVENTURE. PS I ALREADY THREW UP WTF
I've had 5 hours of sleep and I still smell like sex with the Colonel. I don't appreciate spontaneity.
Nothing says I love you like a silicone dragon dick
He was cheering for me from the end of the bar as I sloppily ate a Ruben sandwich. It made me feel really special.
So I've decided that blue balls for lesbians is rainbow balls and the struggle is real
I forget how to act sober
Randomize
