You know the gilmore girls would be alright if it was on mute the whole time
Im trying to find an appropriate gift to your mom for getting both you and your sister on birth control within a week, any suggestions?
This better be legit desert and not your penis alamode
the thought 'we cant do it, we're in a public place' crossed my mind, and then I realized he's succeeding if he's trying to domesticate me.
elevator sex. pronto.
judging by her collection of mens sweaters, shes fucked the entire lands end catalog.
Well you just missed the ten chi o pledges singing la bamba at our doorstep.
I swear to god, if you fuck the hot one you're paying me back for the shot I just bought her
It doesn't matter how many beers you've had, it's unacceptable to piss in someone's helmet after a playoff win.
Marrying her is the worst scenario of any. That includes death and zombies.
Any sexual interaction is meaningless without pizza during half time.
I've sold more douches working here than one man should sell in a lifetime
come pick your gf up from my house. she's sitting in the fridge and hissing at the cat to let her eat the potatoes. btw i dont have a cat
He was walking around and kept offering the neighbors flamingo lawn ornaments shots of vodka.
You know, I'm starting to enjoy brazilians. One day I'm going to make a therapist very very happy.
Do you think he will let me wear my neck fan while he throws my back out?
Please shut the fuck up.
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